It’s been a couple weeks. My only excuse is that I have been beyond busy. And when I’m not busy, I’m too tired to come up with a decent blog post idea. Or I have an idea, but the execution leaves a lot to be desired.

I am about half-way through week 37. Becca was born the day before week 39. We’re thisclose and I am mostly ready. I’m still trying to finish up work, but the actual baby gear is all in place. She has clothes, and washcloths, and burp clothes… I was actually a bit panicky over the burp cloth thing. We just get the cheap cloth diapers, and then use them for everything the first couple of months. Baby with an upset stomach? Out-of-control leaky boobs? Spilled juice on the side table while trying to balance a baby, book, and TV remote? Grab a cloth diaper! Problem solved. The thought of not having any was kinda terrifying. Fortunately, Walmart carried a brand close to what I was looking for, and I just found a couple of our old ones.

Our new washer was delivered this morning. It’s nice. It’s big. And I can’t wait to try it out. It needs to warm up a bit first, so it’ll be this afternoon before I can actually start washing anything. Eventually, we’ll be getting the matching dryer (hopefully in the next month or so). We had money set aside for it, and then my laptop battery finally died the rest of the way. If the cord even came a little loose, the laptop shut itself off, instantly. It made work a bit difficult, so we finally took the plunge and got a new one. It’s smaller than my old one, and the keyboard is taking a bit of getting used to, but it works! It has almost 8x the speed as the old one, and 4x the space. In practical terms, I can now run Word, Chrome and a photo editing program all at once without my computer threatening to explode. I can also use Skype, which wouldn’t even download right on the old one. I got a bluetooth adapter, a headset, and a few other accessories, along with a printer. We haven’t had a printer in three years. I’ve missed it.

Between the rest of the baby stuff, a surprise car repair, the laptop and the washer, our tax refund is gone. It lasted all of four days, which is fine. We always put it towards big purchase for the home. A few years ago, it was a couch, couple of recliners, and a bed. Before that, it was a TV, sound system and camcorder. All of the big purchases are saved for tax season, and it works for us.

We’re still working on getting Becca to stay in her bed all night. She sleeps there without a problem, but she wakes up 3-4 times during the night and has to come get me to get back to sleep. It’s not as bad as it was, but I’d still like uninterrupted sleep at least one night before Fiona arrives. She’s really doing great, though, and I’m so proud of her. She still finds her way back into our bed by 5:30 or 6:00 every day, but I’m okay with that. I enjoy the hour of cuddling before she’s ready for us to get up and start our day. It’s a nice way to start the day.

It’s been around a month since we started working on getting Becca into her own bed at night. And tonight, we start on the final stage. She will (usually) sleep in her own bed for naps, if she doesn’t manage to get out of taking a nap that day. She starts off each night in her own bed, staying there for a couple hours before waking up and coming in to bed with us.

Tonight, the goal is that she will be sleeping all night in her own bed. I’ll be getting up whenever she wakes, and helping her get back to sleep, until she feels comfortable doing it herself. My hope is that, once she sees that coming to our bed isn’t an option, she’ll sleep longer than a couple hours at a time, or at least get better at getting herself back to sleep.

We have five to six weeks before Fiona arrives. I don’t expect things to be perfect by that point, but if she can sleep most of the night without needing me, it’ll be a huge step in the right direction.

What this means for me is that I will not be sleeping for the next several nights. Ha. I’ll be getting up when she does, and I know she falls back to asleep much faster than I do, especially if I have to get up and go into her room. Depending on how things go tonight, I might be setting up the air mattress in there for a few nights. I’m kind of hoping it doesn’t come to that, though. I can deal with a few mostly sleepless nights if it means I get more sleep later on.

Until, you know, Fiona arrives and I give up sleep for another four months.

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UPDATE: The Next Morning

Becca fell asleep without a problem, woke up twice early on, but went right to sleep as soon as she saw me there (I rushed in when she started making noise). Around 10:30, she came wandering out, so we walked back in to her room together. She started crying, so I let her sit on my lap for a while until she was almost back to sleep. Then I helped her get back into her bed, and she was sound asleep in a few minutes.

Which is how she stayed until almost 4:00am. Meanwhile, I was barely sleeping.Not used to having the bed to myself. So, as soon as Mark gets up this afternoon, I’m back to bed for a while.

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Onto the other news… We have a guest blogger tomorrow! Maria Rainier, who blogs at First in Education, emailed me a week ago, expressing interest in writing up a post for Writer Mom at Home. I’m more than happy to have her, and I think you’ll love the recipe she has ready to share with us. Watch for it tomorrow morning!

A few weeks ago, I wrote about how we’re working to get Becca into her own bed (and out of ours). The first thing we tackled was naps. It took a couple weeks, but we finally got into a regular nap schedule. She gets into bed (then finds a dozen reasons to get back out of bed), and I sit in her room until she falls asleep.

Four nights ago, we started on bedtime in her own bed. As I expected, this did not go as smoothly. She is used to sleeping next to me. And, unlike naps which can be occasionally skipped, there is no skipping bedtime.

The first night, she cried, screamed and fussed for half of the two hours I was in there with her. Finally, she fell asleep. The next night was more of the same, but I learned that moving my chair over near her bed seemed to help. Last night, she didn’t cry, but it still took a long time. She was thirsty, needed to use the bathroom, needed an extra hug and kiss… It still took nearly two hours to get her down.

Tonight, I just moved my chair to her bedside from the beginning. We talked a bit, and then I held her hand until she fell asleep. She still got distracted– an itch on her arm and a small scrape on her leg were the big issues– but it only took half an hour to get her to sleep. YAY for progress!

I’m not making her spend all night in her bed. Once she wakes up, she can come sleep with me again. My thought is that, as she gets more comfortable in her bed, she’ll sleep for a longer time. Eventually, she’ll be spending all night in her bed, without needing to come find me if she wakes up. Unless she shows no sign of sleeping longer stretches, I’m going to let this issue work itself out.

What we will be working on, however, is her needing me in the room. I think we’ll start with me leaving the room after a while for nap times, and then having me slowly move away from the bed at night, until I don’t need to be in there at all. I don’t want to be trapped in her room until she falls asleep every time. But I’m going to give her time to adjust to how things are now before I start making more changes.

This is all something I should have started sooner, but I think it took this long for all of us to be ready. It takes a lot of effort to make this change. Instead of happily falling asleep around 7:30, I am being kept up an extra 3-4 hours a night, between putting her to sleep and then waiting for her to wake up again. Once she gets used to coming into our room, I’ll be able to go to bed after she falls asleep, but for the first week or so, it’s easier if I just stay awake so I can get to her before she gets really upset. And, really, I’m enjoying the extra quiet time to myself.

Once this is taken care of, I’ll have all of my goals with her finished before Fiona is born. She is mostly potty trained now (a few accidents here or there if she forgets, and we’re still working on night times), and that was the other big thing. Changing two sets of diapers/pull-ups at a time sounded like torture. She’s even big enough now to get onto the adult toilets on her own, which means less dumping and cleaning of her little potty. I’m more than ready to retire that thing for a couple years.

Sunday evening, I hosted my first ever Ladies Christmas Cookie Exchange party. I invited 20+ friends and family members (all women), and planned out all of the details.

Three people showed up. Ouch. But we still had fun. There wasn’t the variety of cookies I was hoping for (because of the small attendance), but the ones we did have were delicious. We decorated a whole lot of sugar cookies and gingerbread cookies. We ate pizza. We listened to Christmas music.

And we had fun. Did I mention?

This is a really busy time of year for everyone, so I’m not concerned about the number of guests. Next year, I might play with having the party during the week, so I’m not competing with so many other holiday parties. I’ll talk to everyone about it when next November rolls around.

Becca got to help decorate cookies with us, and she had a blast. She dumped half a bottle of green sprinkles all over her plate, and ate more frosting than she got onto the cookies. And waiting until after the pizza to eat all of her cookies was nearly impossible for her. Most of hers were missing pieces by the time she got done with them.

Of course, our table is still covered in cookies waiting to be frosted (I made a lot), peanut butter balls, mints, and other party leftovers. We’ve been eating our way through them over the past couple days. I’m not expecting good things at my gestational diabetes test at this point. Will I fail if my blood supply is already half sugar? Maybe the week before Christmas is a bad time to schedule that test…

The past few days, nap times have been…interesting. I don’t know if she really hasn’t been tired, or if she has just learned how to stay in bed for more than an hour without falling asleep. Nap times have not been happening like I was hoping.

Mark was home today, and I decided to let him handle nap time. I explained our basic guidelines, and let him go to it. Read a story, sing a song, then go sit in the chair across the room to read while she quiets down and falls asleep. Or doesn’t, but at least she’s quiet and resting for an hour, and I get some quality time with a book or two.

First, Mark has trouble getting her in there, so I pitch in. They read a story, and then another. And another… And then they start singing. He tries to wrap up, and she starts screaming. I wait a while, and then poke my head in to see what’s going on. I end up sitting down beside her and getting her to sleep while Mark reads his book watches on.

But, she slept, for almost an hour, and woke up in a much better mood. We got to play Candyland afterward, and it turns out that Becca cheats. She kept moving the cookie people around, picking out her cards from a handful of several cards. I still won (not intentionally) but she didn’t care. She was more than happy just playing. And cheating. Mostly because every time she did, Mark and I couldn’t stop laughing. She did it so matter-of-factly, like she’d been playing that way forever. It just killed us.

The nap thing is part of a…thing…we’re doing. I have a few books on preschool discipline/general discipline that I’m working through. I was looking for some ideas on dealing with some of the issues Becca and I have been having. She is growing her own personality, which is fine. Great, even. But I was having difficulty with being a steady, consistent source of guidance. I am a bit of a push-over, especially where Becca is concerned, and it’s way past time to change that. So, we have a reward chart for basic daily tasks (brush teeth and hair, take nap, pick up toys and clothes). We’re also working out of the 1-2-3 Magic book, which uses time outs as the center of behavior management. I’m not fond of time outs being used whenever parents are annoyed, but I think that they’re useful when they need to be used. I’ve seen some parents go nuts with this idea, turning to time outs for every tiny infraction (and for many things that are just normal, age-appropriate behavior), and using time outs that are way too long for the child. I do a minute for each year (Becca gets 3 minutes), and I’ll add on a minute if she can’t stay in her chair/bed, or if she continues to fight. I’m also focusing more on spending extra quality time with her, and providing extra praise when she does well, both part of the 1-2-3 program.

I’m combining these ideas with the ideas in a couple other books, and it’s working well so far. I’m happy with the progress we’re starting to make. Having more control over her has made nap times easier, which has made bedtimes easier. The extra sleep has made everything easier. Becca is even enjoying the changes in our daily routines.

Now, I just have to explain everything to Mark, and get him on board with everything.

So, our nap plan didn’t work as I wanted. I ended up working until nearly 2:00, and then we headed out to Ithaca for the afternoon. We have been promising Becca a trip to see a movie, and Tangled looked really promising. We went to an early showing, hoping that a less-crowded theater would be a lot easier for us. Less to worry about if she started getting loud.

She did great. She sat through most of the movie, and didn’t bother the people around us too much. And as the theater was empty when we got there, and still mostly empty when the movie was playing, anyone that chose to sit right in front of or behind a three year old gets what they have coming. She was more or less quiet through the whole thing, and was absolutely enchanted by the horse and chameleon. Even Mark and I really enjoyed it. I’m glad we finally got out to a movie with her, and knowing that she knows how to behave through one, we’ll try to go a few more times before Fiona is born.

I spent part of the time in the mall (where the theater is) looking through Best Buy at the laptops. My current laptop is on its last legs (it’s old), and I’ve been trying to pick out an eventual replacement. My current choice is a Sony, and they had a very similar model in stock that I got to play with for a while. We also looked at the Blu-Ray players. Our DVD player died a while back, and the one we were borrowing from my in-laws followed shortly after we hooked it up. It’s not us, I swear. The first player overheated to death, and the borrowed one was in rough shape to begin with. If we have to replace them anyhow, we want to upgrade to blu-ray. Unfortunately, it hasn’t happened yet. Maybe that’ll be the family Christmas gift from Santa this year, along with a few movies.

Today, we’re heading out to get our Christmas tree. Last year was our first time getting a real tree, and Mark complained the whole way. It was cold. We had to take a wagon ride, and then walk around to find the tree, and chop it down ourselves. Wouldn’t it be easier to just get one of the pre-cut ones back at the main office? And then he found “the tree”. It was 10 feet tall, and beautiful. So, now he’s looking forward to going through the process again this year. We have a lot of fun, though, and there’s free hot chocolate and cookies when we get back to the place where you pay for everything, along with lots of other yummy treats you can purchase. Then, we come home to eggnog and an evening of decorating the tree and watching Christmas movies.

I can’t wait.

I have a confession to make– Becca has a beautiful princess bed, has had it for almost a year now (it was a Christmas gift last year), and she never sleeps in it. Ever. She happily piles toys on it, and plays in it, but sleep? Not if she can help it.

We started her out cosleeping. It worked for us, and truthfully, I still enjoy it. At least, until she digs her pointy little toes into my legs or wakes me up to switch to the other side of the bed (there is a difference, evidently). For the most part, though, it works.

The problem is that it’s Mark’s bed too. And when he is home at night (only a couple nights a week, but still), all three of us don’t fit as well as we used to. Between Becca’s longer reach when she stretches out and my constant tossing and turning to get comfortable, it’s not working anymore. Unfortunately, every attempt to get her to sleep in her bed ends in tears. So, I would give in. Discipline (in any sense of the word) is not my strong suit, and Becca is a bit on the strong-willed side.

Yesterday, though, was a very long day. Potty training is still not going well. (Seriously? We’ve been working on it for the past 9 months!) She knows how to go on her potty, she knows there is a reward (gummy bear) for doing so, and she knows how much happier everyone is when we don’t have towels all over the floor to clean up the messes. She just…chooses not to use the potty. Ugh. And I am on a tangent…

Anyhow, rough day. I finally told her that she was taking a nap. In her room. And I wasn’t taking no for an answer. In we went, and I read her a book, then settled down to wait it out. She cried. She promised that she was in a better mood, and she reached out for any toy/paper/random junk she could get her hand on. Finally, I told her that she wasn’t there to play, she was there to sleep. Finally, after a half hour, she threw herself down onto the mattress, face first, and stayed still long enough to fall asleep. Hurray!

She woke up an hour later, screaming. Once she calmed down, she got some yogurt and we played a round of Candyland. That’s the deal– after a nap, we get special mommy (or daddy) time. Most likely in the form of a game or craft project. My goal is that once we adjust to naps in her bed, we’re moving to nights.

After her nap, we had a much better day. We talked about how naps make us happier, and she seemed to buy it. She’s accepting the idea of another nap today, so hopefully we can build on our momentum from yesterday, and have another good day.

I’ve never been particularly accident prone. At least, not to the extent of serious injuries.

My daughter seems to be making up for that.

Yesterday, we were supposed to be getting one of our living room windows replaced, upgrading to a more energy efficient model. The hammering and what-not would have kept Mark from getting any sleep after he got off work, so it was agreed that he was going to his mom’s after work, so he could sleep there.

Of course, the window guy didn’t show up. So, Becca and I continued along our day. She was playing with her new toys from her birthday, and I was working on my NaNoWriMo project. Then I heard a sharp thud, followed closely by a scream. I ran out to the other room, and saw Becca sitting on the floor, one of my four pound hand weights sitting near her foot. I scooped her up, and brought her to a chair so I could look at the foot. By that point, one side had swollen up to nearly twice its normal size, and there was already a dark purple bruise forming. With the way it was screaming, I was certain it was broken. Lots of little bones in the foot, none of which do well being crushed by a solid piece of metal (even with the silicone-like covering).

This is the point where I would normally wake Mark up, tell him to get dressed, and we’d head off to the hospital. Except he wasn’t home. I tried calling his mom’s place, and got no answer. So I called his mom’s cell number– she was off in Syracuse. So I called my Step-mom, finally getting a hold of her after a scramble to find her number. She came to pick us up and went to the ER with us.

By this point, Becca had stopped crying, but her foot was still an alarming shade of purple. We didn’t have a long wait before we were called back, where the doctors teased her about her weight training practices. She enjoyed the attention. An x-ray was ordered, and then we waited.

An hour later, we learned that she just had a nasty bruise. Nothing was broken. We were told to give her some Tylenol, use ice if she’d let us, and try to keep her off of it for a bit. An hour or two after we got home, she was already up walking around on it, barely limping. This morning, the swelling has mostly gone down, just leaving the bruise. It’s not slowing her down at all, although I’m still going to try to keep her off it when I can.

We have an appointment tomorrow with her pediatrician, just for a follow-up. I’m hoping they can do her three-year appointment at the same time. I forgot to schedule one, and seeing as we’ll be there anyhow… I think this is an off-year for vaccinations, so all they really need to do is measure her and weigh her, which they’ll do anyhow.

I can’t wait until the appointment is done and her foot goes back to looking normal. It doesn’t seem to bother her at all, but I don’t like seeing her foot all banged up.

There have been several big changes in the Upson household over the past several months, partially contributing to the lack of posts. Things are really exciting right now, and I’m hoping that my new found free time means that I’ll be able to write more here.

Mark (my husband) started a new job in August, and it took a lot of adjustment for everyone. He no longer has every weekend off, and he’s really working nights now. Long hours, lots of overtime, and I’m getting really used to him not hogging the covers. Which is kind of nice.

The new job pays significantly more than the old job did, so I’ve been able to cut way back on the work I was doing. While I still take jobs, and I have a regular client I write for each week, I haven’t been searching for new work. I’m now almost entirely a stay-at-home mom. I also still make cakes on occasion (you can see my work at UpsonCakes.com), but not the 1-2 a week that I was doing for a few months.

I love the break from work-related writing. There are only so many articles I can write before my brain starts to fizzle. On the other hand, I still don’t like housework. Before, Mark was in charge of a lot of it. Especially the dishes. Now, it’s all on me, and it’s taking a while to get into the habit of keeping the house clean. I don’t mind, because this means I finally have the time and opportunity to do all of the stuff that kept getting put off (sorting, organizing, ect.), so the house is finally starting to make sense. I can find things again.

I’ve also had time to start “home schooling” Becca. She’ll be three next week, and we’ve been working on recognizing numbers and letters, basic addition and subtracting, and writing skills. She’s such a fast learner, and it’s been great having the extra time to spend on this stuff.

The big change around here, though, has been this:

The Newest Family Member

Mark and I found out right after Father’s Day that we will be adding another member to our family. It’s a girl, and she’ll be making her arrival in the end of February or beginning of March. Our actual due date is March 6, but I went a week early with Becca, so I’m hoping to do the same this time.

I’m just over 20 weeks along at this point. No complaints, lots of movement (both Becca and Mark have felt her kick), and I’m starting to develop a nice bump. Becca is very excited about being a big sister, and has been practicing taking care of her dolls. We’ve been discussing the changes a new baby will bring, and she seems to understand that the baby will cry a lot at first, and not be very good at playing until she gets a bit older. I’m sure there will still be some huge adjustments when we bring the new baby home, but I think Becca is starting to get used to the idea.

I’m not making promises, but I’m going to try to start keeping up with posts over here again. I actually have stuff to blog about now that I’m doing more than just working. Also, I have a guest post going up soon on a friend’s blog. I’ll post the details as soon as I have them.

I used to have a routine I performed every Thursday. I would tie my hair back, and then use a facial scrub, mask and peel on my face. That was back when I was still working on a farm; my face needed all of the extra cleaning and exfoliating it could get. I’d finish the process by slathering on a moisturizer, and then maybe painting my nails or doing a few other girlie-type things.

And then I moved in with my husband, and sort of lost that bit of free time every week. Besides, who wants to let their new-ish boyfriend see them with green mud all over their face?

At some point over the past couple of years, I purchased some new facial stuff. I probably used it a couple of times, and then set them aside and forgot about it. I found them again yesterday while digging through our storage room, and pulled them out.

Today, I am dedicating a few hours to Me Time again. Becca slept in this morning, so I had the chance to do a mini-facial and use some nice lotion. I even painted my toenails a startling shade of blue. (It was the only nail polish I could find.) Becca keeps coming over to check them out.

A little later this afternoon, my very talented cousin is coming down to chop a few inches off my hair. My last haircut was over seven months ago– I’m long overdue. I’m going with a much shorter, and a little bit flirtier, cut. I might even start looking at hair colors. My hair is caught somewhere between blond and brown, and I would like to give it a nudge in one direction or another.

It’s summer. I’ll be spending a lot more time outside. You know, in public. That means that I have to at least attempt to look a little put together, especially with now running a business that requires me to actually meet people. No more hiding behind the computer.

I’ll post some pictures a little later later this week. I can’t wait to see the final result.